Showing posts with label women. Show all posts
Showing posts with label women. Show all posts

Friday, November 1, 2013

Live & Let Live: On lifting the Headscarf Ban at the Parliament


Author at the Turkish Grand National Assembly, Summer 2013
Finally, Turkish legislature corrected a portion of its long overdue dress-code.  As of today (October 31, 2013) women parliamentarians who choose to wear a headscarf can sit on those fancy orange seats.

More than half the women cover their hair in Turkey (approx. 60-65%). Yet, the very institution that is supposedly  representing "the people", would not allow any of these women to hold a seat at the Parliament.

After their pilgrimage to Mecca this year, 4 women MPs decided that they would like to cover their hair from then on. Hence, they came to the Parliament with their new headgear today, and there was no sign of uncivilized protesting or bullying.

There's only a few months left until the elections. We don't know how much of this sudden surge in religiosity is genuine, and how much of it is political calculation. But we do not have a little gadget to measure people's sincerity. Nor should we try to do so. If anything, it might be wise to use this opportunity to lift other ridiculous bans at the Parliament floor, such as No Drinking Water and No Pants for Women (No, I'm not kidding. You cannot sip water even if you're diabetic. Nor can women wear pants and sit on those fancy orange seats. One MP with a prosthetic leg is compelled to wear a skirt, despite expressing her discomfort to display her artificial limb).

There is a great Turkish saying: "zarfa değil, mazrufa bak". It means: don't pay much attention to the envelope, look at the content. It is our way of saying, don't judge a book by its cover. I'm afraid lately all we look at is the envelope/cover....

As a society we need to :

 1) accept people as they are

 2) learn to NOT judge people by their proverbial cover

 3) appreciate each other's differences as legitimate

 4) NOT perceive all forms of difference as a THREAT

5) nor treat differences as frontiers to conquer, suppress and assimilate

6) respectadvocate for the rights of those who're different from us.

7) consider diversity as an asset, rather than liability

We all have to learn to live with each other. Kurds in Turkey have no other place to go. Neither do the religious folks, nor the uber-secularists. Even the non-Muslims, such as the native Armenian, Assyrian, Greek or Jewish communities don't want to leave Turkey, despite all the abuse they have gone through.

Anyone who knows people living in Turkey would know very well that we are one hard-headed people. Mom used to call me "inatçı keçi!"(stubborn goat), when I would resist her and give her the silent treatment.

We cannot bully each other into submission. Those who believe progress means secularism and modernization a la the West will remain that way. No amount of mosque building, media censuring, indoctrination at schools and alcohol ban would change their conviction.

Likewise, those who think salvation is in religion would not change their ways and endorse Westernization, even if the EU takes Turkey in as a member tomorrow.

Kurds and Alevis, on the other hand, have been mistreated so harshly for so long that there is not a single method of abuse or torture that they have not already been subject to. Yet, they're still here, still trying to be part of the game.

For the last decade or so, the Turkish economy remained in the same ranks (17th-18th largest in the world), while other emerging economies showed steady progress (Brazil moved from 11th to 6th). We have a major urban development problem. 2-3 cities in the country are growing into monstrous metropolises, at the expense of all the other cities and towns. They suck up all the resources and human capital, but their sheer size is making them unmanageable and unlivable. This is not a healthy, sustainable trend. People should be able to have the chance for a decent living (i.e. jobs, education, quality living conditions, etc), in the other 70-some cities in Turkey as well.

But we can't even get to talk about these crucial socio-economic problems. We cannot deliberate on practical, policy issues. Because we get bogged down by identity issues. Frankly, we seem to hate each other lately... A very superficial understanding of who you are (islamist if you cover your head, secularist if you drink!!) dominates the discussion. If you're in a different identity camp, we don't even listen to what have to you say.

Each side seems to be waiting for the weakest moment of its opponent to strike a final blow. The happiest moment seems to be when we become one homogenous entity, devoid of color and flavor... But let me reiterate: we're stubborn. No one will give up the essential components of their identity, no one will give in..

Besides, I don't know a single true democracy where citizens are judged and sorted out by their outfits! In fact, in established democracies, this very act would be 'profiling' and a crime, since it is blatant discrimination!

Let us please learn to appreciate each other as who we are.
Let us learn to live together as who we are.
Let us not look at headgear or mustache style, but look at what's inside that head. What kind of ideas and proposals are inside that brain?
Let us learn to argue over rational, measurable projects and proposals, instead of all this emotional, immature personality attacks.
Let's grow up to be rational, reasonable adults.

We cannot all love each other.
But we have to learn to respect each other as who we are.
Time is running out...
Soon, we'll degenerate into a poor, unhappy, dysfunctional society that is constantly at war with each other.

Wednesday, August 24, 2011

Willie's Kindergarten Days!

Esteemed Readers,

August 18th was a very important day for our family. Not only was it Willie's birthday, but also it was his first day of school!

Willie is attending a real school now. Here is how a typical day goes by:

He lines up outside with his class at 8:30. With the bell, they walk into the classroom. Then, they take out the folders from their backpacks and hang the backpacks in the coatroom. There is this folder ritual every morning. Their teacher, the ever-smiling lovely Mrs. Banks, checks the folders for homework and notes for the teacher. Afterwards, they go and take their places on the carpet. Subsequent to morning greetings, they stand up for the pledge of allegiance.

Below are the words of the original pledge. I included this for my international readers, since like myself, they may not be too familiar with this interesting American ritual...

"I pledge allegiance to my Flag and the Republic for which it stands, one nation, indivisible, with liberty and justice for all."

Today, with gradual additions, it reads like this:

"I pledge allegiance to the flag of the United States of America, and to the republic for which it stands, one nation under God, indivisible, with liberty and justice for all."

So, as we can see, nation-state is alive and well, wherever we go...

After the pledge, the real stuff begins! They do a lot of reading exercises, sing along with the teacher, do writing and coloring. After each project, they pack up and put away their supplies behind their chairs in a very orderly fashion.

There are 23 kids in class. As I spent all morning with them today, I was amazed at how Mrs. Banks keeps on top of them all. She does this in a sweet but firm way. It's been only 4 days since the school started, but they all seemed to have internalized the rules and routines in the classroom. Kudos for Mrs. Banks! And she accomplished all this, despite the fact that her house flooded! I couldn't believe how she still could maintain such a positive spirit despite the $30,000 damage in her basement and an uphill battle with her insurance company. More kudos for Mrs. Banks!

Here are some lessons that I took from Willie's class today:
  • In America, they really try to cultivate the kids as independent individuals very early on.
(There was one little girl in Willie's class, who cried for her parents during recess. No one paid attention to her, or tried to cuddle her. Eventually, I went by and tried to calm her down...)
  • In America, rules are very important.
(Even when things seem disorderly, there is always an order and logic behind. The kids know where to sit on the carpet, how to sit, where to put their folders, how to browse books and read the pictures. In the end, good behavior yields pennies! The teacher gives a penny to good kids for saving in their penny jar.)

  • In America, you need to eat your lunch fast!
(They have only 20 minutes for lunch. And this includes lining up, filling your tray, finding a seat, and opening your milk and other goodie bags. I was so impressed when I saw Willie filling up his tray and opening his of carton of milk all by himself!... And they give no straws!! (See the entry about independent individuals above) No babying around and drinking from straws in the lunch room. Today, Willie could eat just half of his meal (hamburger + baby potatoes) but finished all of his fruit (pineapple) and milk.)

  • In America, elementary schools are run by women!
(Today, I barely saw 1 or 2 men around the school premises. The teachers were almost all women, the assisting staff were women, the involved parents (PTA folks) were women and the Principal is a really nice lady... In short, the elementary school is women's turf!)

Wishing you all a great Fall semester, and brilliant, independent students,

Academic Mommy